Woo to You Too! Chapt 1
by BlueShift5
Summary: Friendship takes on a whole new dimension when a raccoon goddess gets involved!
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own any of the characters of Sandra and Woo! They belong to Oliver Knorzer!**

 **A/N: Friendship takes on a whole new dimension when a raccoon goddess gets involved!**

 **Woo To You, Too!**

 **Chapt. 1: Mirror Mirror**

Sandra burst through the door of her home, looking angry to tears.

 _"Stupid Cloud! Stupid Larisa!"_ she grumbled, tossing her backpack to the floor. She plopped herself down on the couch, half expecting her father to come running in to see what was wrong with his precious baby girl. That is, until she saw the open note on the coffee table.

 _[Don't wait up, sweetie, I have a date with Melody! There's a frozen pizza in the fridge! You know what to do! Love, Dad]_

Sandra wrinkled her nose at the thought. _"Ugh! Pizza?! Again?! That man's head is going to fill up with sausage and cheese one day!"_ The young girl picked up her books, and went to her room, thinking a nice soak in the tub would soothe her bruised ego. She found her pet raccoon, Woo, curled up on her bed, as he was apt to do more often, now that the weather was slowly beginning to creep towards winter. Seeing him made her smile again. Woo was her friend, totally unassuming, and non-judgmental. He gave fairly honest advice based on what he observed of the humans, but she did not want to wake him for something that was probably a misunderstanding anyway, and quietly set her things down next to the computer.

The days of autumn were becoming more obvious, the leaves on the trees slowly losing their green coats, exchanging them for more colorful fare. Larisa liked the season, for the changing leaves reminded her of her fiery passion: flames. Today she had dressed up in oranges and reds, like the firecracker she was. Her boyfriend, Landon, went back East for a Christian seminar, which his mother insisted he attend. With Landon gone, Larisa began to flirt with Cloud, Sandra's boyfriend, with whom she once had a huge crush on. Sandra understood this about her friend, and they often found themselves teasing poor Cloud, who during the past summer, had been caught in an embarrassing predicament between the two girls, flaunting their maturing bodies in front of him. Sexy bodies were the topic once again. Larisa, having developed a little more than usual since the summer, was wearing a light sleeveless shirt in spite of the chill in the air, and pushed her burgeoning boobs together to show more cleavage, while trying to get another rise out of the boy.

"What do you think, Cloud? Are they _'centerfold'_ worthy?" she giggled. He was on to her antics, but still began to redden. He crossed his arms, diverting his eyes away.

"I prefer smaller breasts, . . . like Sandy's . . ." That brought a hardy guffaw from Larisa, and a scathing glare from Sandra.

She stormed off, leaving Cloud with a foot stuck in his mouth, apologizing profusely, but she would hear none of it. Larisa restrained him from running after her, for she knew Sandra would cool off after his faux pas, and be a bit more reasonable. Besides, she was partly to blame for instigating the whole business.

"Let her be, Cloud. I know Sandy. She'll calm down!" In spite of the sad look he now bore, he knew she was right. Sandra wouldn't let it go just yet, but it would eventually come, then she'd be the one apologizing. They'd kiss and make up, which was always the best part, then all would be well once more.

But, for the time being, Sandra would remain pissed at both of them.

 **Bubbles**

In the privacy of her own room, she practiced making angry faces in the mirror. It was no use, she was already regretting her earlier actions, and couldn't find it in her heart to stay mad at her two best friends.

The young girl went into her bathroom to start a bubble bath going, making sure the water temperature was right, before pouring in the required amount of bath beads. She glanced towards the bed to check if Woo was still sleeping, and grabbed her fresh set of pajamas from her dresser. She pulled off her sweater, then the undershirt, leaving her bra on. Her shoes and sweat pants came off next, and she looked herself over in the closet door mirror once more, turning to the left, then the right, checking the profile of her bust. _"Stupid Cloud."_ she muttered again, and removed her remaining articles of clothing, tossing them in the hamper.

The tub was nearly filled, and Sandra rolled her pony-tail into a bun before tucking everything under a bonnet. She closed the door, leaving it only slightly ajar, to conserve the warm steam, now beginning to fill the room. A couple of drops of a honey-lilac liquid, completed the bath, and she stepped in, slowly lowering herself down. Immediately, she began to feel better. It reminded her of happier times, with her mom sitting nearby, watching her play with her tub toys. A pleasant memory, but not enough to remove the sting of her sudden loss. It was an incredibly sad time in her life, but finding Woo so soon after, filled at least a portion of the void it left in her heart.

Sandy slid deeper into the tub, becoming one with the bubbles. A soft rapping on the door made her look up. It was Woo.

"Sandra? May I come in?" he asked.

"Sure. I was just thinking about you!" She thought nothing of him entering when she was bathing. They'd taken plenty of baths together when she first got him. She was younger then, and didn't really care if she was bare naked in front of him. Besides, he once told her he thought humans were ugly! Imagine that. Even though she was older now, things never changed. He'd even come in when she was sitting on the toilet, but she drew the line there as she got older, and required him to knock first before entering.

"Is everything all right?" he asked, "I thought I heard some banging around downstairs, and here you are, taking a bubble bath. You only take bubble baths when you're upset about something!" She gave a sheepish grin.

"Y-yeah, that was me. Cloud put his foot in his mouth, and said my breasts were too small, and I got mad at him!" Woo took a quick glance.

"But your breasts look fine to me! Why did he tell you that?"

"Larisa was teasing him, and showing off her own boobs. She was trying to get another boner out of him, but he slipped up on his comeback!" Woo chuckled.

"Honestly, the things you humans get excited about! I'm glad we raccoons only have to put up with it once a year!"

"You mean, like, during mating season?"

"Yes." Sandy put her arms up on the side of the tub, placing her chin on her hands.

"What's it like?"

"Well, during mating season, the females release a scent that drives us males absolutely crazy with the mating urge! We end up competing with each other for the female! Afterwards, the winner and the female go off together, and there's much cuddling, and licking between the . . ." Sandra rolled her eyes.

"Stop right there! You told me about this once before!"

"But you were younger then. Aren't you a bit more open-minded now?"

"If you mean curious, then maybe. I figured you were going to give me some super graphic, porno version of what goes on!"

"I can, if that's what you want! And by the way, . . . you smell really nice!" Sandra was taken aback by his words, and she blushed fiercely. Woo smirked. "I meant there's something in the _water_ that smells really nice!"

"I-I knew that!" she said, a tiny bit of embarrassment colored her reply.

" _Nooo_ , you thought I meant a 'mating scent'!" he snickered.

"It's lilac and honey, for your information!"

"Of course it is! Now if you'll excuse me, I'll let you finish your bath in private!" As he began to leave, Sandy called out to him.

"Hey, Woo! Wanna watch a movie with me? My dad went out on a date, and I'd like some company tonight!" The raccoon stopped short of the door.

"Sure! What are we going to watch?"

" _Over the Hedge_!"

" _Really? A movie about a talking raccoon?_ How unlikely is that!"

"I'm making _piiiiizza_! Are you in?"

"If you insist!" He shut the door, and made a dive for the tub. A few moments of splashing and raucous laughter ensued.

After Sandra's shortened bath, she prepped the oven for the frozen pizza, and stuck the dvd into the player. She placed a half bag of potato chips in a bowl, and brought it out with a tub of spinach dip. Some grapes and apple slices for variety, completed their snacks for the night. The ding of a timer reminded the girl to put the pizza in, and she scrambled to find a pan for it. Fifteen minutes. She reset the timer, and joined Woo on the sofa to watch a bunch of shorts before the main movie started.

It had been a while since they enjoyed some fun time together. Woo was spending more time with Lily and the kits in the forest, and Sandra was beginning to spend an equal amount of time with Cloud. She would still be with him tonight, if not for his slip of the tongue. On the other hand, Woo had been playing a little too rough with the kits, and accidentally dropped two of them, attracting the ire of mama Lily, who immediately banished him for a week. Thus the two found themselves together once more, like the good old days, which, by all accounts, was only about two years ago. The raccoon sat on the floor so he could be closer to the food, while Sandy lay sprawled across the sofa, picking at the chips and dip as she pleased. An occasional scratch between the ears let Woo know she was right behind him, and not be so messy with the food he was gobbling down. She got up when the timer went off, and took the pizza out of the oven. Her furry friend followed her into the kitchen, for he loved the smell of melty cheeses and sausage, and couldn't wait to get his paws on a slice or two.

"Careful, Woo, it's still pretty hot!" She donned kitchen mitts to remove the pizza from the oven, and placed it on their chopping block for slicing. He kept his paws away as Sandra sliced it up, and remembered the first time he tried to grab food fresh out of a hot oven. He learned his lesson that day. Fortunately, some quick thinking and a bucket of ice solved that problem, otherwise he would have to be taken to the vet.

She plucked a morsel off, and blew on it to cool it down, before handing it to him. Woo liked sausages for they reminded him of big fat caterpillars, only firmer, and oilier, but tastier. He liked human food for that reason, but realized it wasn't all that healthy, so he ate lots of fruits, nuts, and vegetables whenever he could. His master would never be able to survive in the forest on her own. Or would she?

They both grabbed paper plates, placing a couple of slices in each, and headed into the living room, where their movie was already starting. Woo was quite excited, not so much about the raccoon movie as about all the food laid out before him. Likewise, Sandy was not interested in the movie. She just wanted to spend some quality time with her pal, whom she felt she had been neglecting.

Somewhere before the end of the movie, Woo had joined Sandra on the couch, his head plopped down on her lap, hinting for a nice tummy rub. She giggled, then obliged him.

"Your tummy feels awfully taut," she thumped it like a drum, "shall I put away the rest of the food?"

"My dear, you severely underestimate the food holding capacity of my kind!"

"But you look like you're about ready to burst!"

"Nothing that a soothing tummy rub can't fix!" Sandy just smiled and continued rubbing.

"So what did you think about the movie?"

"Meh! It's like I told you! Totally unrealistic! If I was that bear, I would have eaten all of them, and be done with it! Hibernation be damned!"

"Says the real life talking raccoon! Wanna watch another? I don't think my dad is coming home anytime soon!"

"I'm getting kinda comfortable now. What kind of movie is it?"

"A scary movie!"

" _Scary?!_ If I have to watch that, you'll definitely have a problem with my food holding capacity!"

"Don't think I've forgotten that time when Cloud scared you, and you peed on me! Let me try an experiment . . ." she giggled. Sandra took a grape, and bit it in half, waving a piece in front of Woo's nose. "If you explode, I'm gonna use your hide to wipe up the mess!" He knew she was kidding. His eyes followed the grape as it zig-zagged, left and right. But he surprised her by grabbing her hand with his paws, drawing it closer to his mouth. Instead of taking it then and there, Woo licked at it, nibbling her fingertips with his teeth, before taking the half grape. It sent an unexpected thrill through her body. He was playing one of his raccoon games with her, in a way asking _"Do you trust me enough to put your fingers in my mouth?"_ She would play this same game with him. North took another grape, and held it between her lips. She again hovered over him, and he took it, brushing his pokey lips against hers. She smiled, curious. They had smooched before, playfully, sometimes accidentally, sometimes because of dreams, but never . . . romantically. She tapped him gently on the tip of his nose.

"What are you doing?" she asked. He looked at her from upside down, his dark eyes slightly amused.

"After seeing that movie, I was just wondering if that is how all humans perceive us forest animals." She raised an eyebrow before answering him.

"Well, we do tend to anthropomorphize . . .  
"Anthropo . . . what?"

"It means that we like to imagine that in some ways, animals think and act like us!"

"Like me, for instance?"

"You are a unique exception, but it's a definite plus if you can talk! Now tell me, what were you trying to do back there?"

"I thought maybe if humans think of us in a certain way, then might we forest creatures not also think of _them_ similar to _us_?"

"How so?"

"Among male and female raccoons, we sometimes exchange what you might think of as . . . 'gifts' . . ."

"That's cute!"

". . . when we're sizing each other up as potential mates!"

"Wait a minute! _You're sizing me up as a mate?!_ "

"No! It's a way to assess how much your potential partner would be willing to provide for you! Please don't misunderstand me, Sandy! You asked, so out of common courtesy and trust, I'm telling you! I don't really think of you as a 'potential mate', but you do provide me with food, shelter, and belly rubs, so by raccoon custom, I'm supposed to reciprocate!"

"Huh! How fascinating!"

"You're not . . . offended . . . are you?"

"I'm kinda flattered, actually!"

"And I don't think of you as my master, either, but in raccoonish, we have no equivalent word to describe what humans call a 'girlfriend'! All females, regardless of species, are either mates, or potential mates!"

"Does that mean raccoons are horny all the time?" she snickered.

"Let me put it this way," he peered deep into her eyes, ". . . I've often wondered what _you_ would look like as a raccoon!"

"Now you're pulling my leg!" Sandy laughed, "But truth be told, I'm also curious about what you would look like as a human, 'cause you can be quite charming at times!"

"Ha ha ha! I imagine I would be the handsomest guy you ever laid eyes on!"

"Really? Because most raccoons look alike! I'd recognize you right away because I'm familiar with your facial patterns, but I might have a problem if there were a dozen like you running around!"

"I'll prove it to you! There's a way you can see me as a human, and I can see you as a raccoon!"

"Oh? And how are you going to make this happen?"

"One word! _See-o-ahtlah-maka-skay!_ "

"The raccoon goddess?"

"We'll need to put together an offering plate of her favorite goodies to attract her here! She will certainly have some way that we can see each other as human and raccoon!"

" **What? No Pizza?!**

Sandra cleared off the coffee table in preparation, and Woo raided the fridge and pantry for anything that would make a suitable offering to the goddess. They lit some candles and incense, more for mood enhancement, only because Sandra, being a girl, insisted. They sat facing each other, and held hands as Woo called out the goddess' name in the prescribed fashion.

"Oh Great and Glorious One, Seeoahtlahmakaskay! Come and partake of this feast we have prepared for a special audience!" A few minutes went by.

"Nothings happening, Woo!"

"Shush! She comes now!" Shortly, a gentle breeze filled the living room, and the candle flames wavered. The room now smelled of wildflowers, lilac and honey. The goddess appeared, seated on a cloud, and hovered near the offerings.

 _"A fine feast for your goddess! I accept it, but I smell pizza, and yet there is none here!"_ Sandra was about to jump up.

"I can get you some!"

 _"Don't trouble yourself, little one, I'll just help myself!"_ She zoomed into the kitchen, and returned with a couple of slices. _"I love pizza, but no one ever offers me any!"_ She looked into the eyes of Woo and Sandy, still sitting on the floor, and holding hands. _"Oh my! Is something wrong? Are you not happy with Lily, dear Woo?"_ Sandra looked around nervously, and blushed once more.

"You are jumping to conclusions, Madame Goddess! This is my friend . . ."

 _"I know who she is, Woo, I'm just teasing!"_ The goddess stepped off her cloud, and sat down next to them on the floor. _"Sandra North, you want to know what Woo would look like as a human, and Woo, you want to know what Sandra would look like as a raccoon! Such an unusual and interesting request! I am intrigued!"_

"Has no one ever asked you for this before?"

 _"Not that I can remember! But then, you are the only talking raccoon in the world, and the only one with the ability to communicate an idea from a human! Because of that, no raccoon has ever developed the kind of relationship that you and Sandra have."_

"You can do this, no problem?" asked the blonde-haired girl.

 _"But of course!"_ the goddess stood up with a flourish, _"Now then, children, how would you like to begin this fantasy of yours'? Would you, Woo, want to spend time with Sandra, as a human? Do human type activities, and meet her friends on equal footing? And you, Sandra North, do you want to spend a like amount as a raccoon, following Woo in his footsteps as he travels through the forest, meeting his friends and doing things that all raccoons like to do?"_

"Uh, . . . really, we only wanted to see what we both looked like as human and raccoon! We were hoping you had something like a magic mirror we could look into?"

 _"Nonsense!"_ she dismissed Sandy's objections with a simple wave of her hand, _"Where's your sense of adventure! Let me handle this! This should be lots of fun!"_

Without another word, the goddess created a magical mist that swirled around both Woo and Sandra. They heard her voice, as it faded like an echo in the distance. _"A time as each, you both shall be! Have fun! I know I will!"_

 **End Chapter 1**

 **A/N: Lots of fun for . . . _who?!_ Let me say first, I love Sandra and Woo, and have been following it faithfully for several years now! It's manga-esque characters (they're supposed to be tweeners!) and storylines touch on some very adult themes (human rights, diabetes, homosexuality, school bullying, the foibles of the social network, to name a few!), making it even more surprising since it is promoted as a comedy strip. But then, I don't really need to tell you readers this, now do I?**

 **Like many who read S &W, I'm still waiting for an explanation of how Woo can talk. To tell you the truth, I don't think we're gonna get one!**

 **I've made references to a number of S &W comic strips. See if you can identify them all!**

 **When Woo first met Lily, he caught a fish for her! That's the kind of "gift" he was talking about!**


	2. Mother Hen

**I do not own any of the characters from Sandra and Woo! They belong to Oliver Knörzer!**

 **A/N: So what's a girl to do when her favorite pet turns into some hot guy that every girl and her sister wants a piece of? Pray, and don't pull hairs too much! Some of you thought that first chapter was _awkward_! You ain't seen nothing yet!**

 **Woo to You, Too!**

 **Chapter 2: Mother Hen**

The sound of Seeoatlahmakaskay's voice was the last thing Sandra and Woo heard as the room began to spin around them. The lights faded, and they held onto each other tightly until the darkness overtook them. When the lights returned, the pair found themselves below the sofa, on the floor. They had flopped onto the carpet, still disoriented, and Woo got up first, shaking Sandra by the shoulder. Her phone was going off, and it was already morning. She grabbed the phone from his hand, and rolled away to answer it. It was her dad, Richard.

"Dad? Where are you?" she answered, still trying to shake the sleep out of her head.

 _"Sorry honey, but my tire blew out when I dropped Melody off at her home, and rather than let me change it in the dark, she fixed up her sofa, and let me sleep at her place!"_

 _"How convenient."_ she said icily.

 _"Didn't you get any of my messages?"_ Sandra checked her phone to see six of them.

"Sorry, I must have been too tired to notice."

 _"Have you eaten breakfast yet? Shall I bring something on the way back?"_

"It's okay, Woo and I have lots of leftovers!"

 _"All right. I'll see you in about an hour!"_

"I may go out to see Cloud and Larisa. I think I owe them an apology for yesterday!"

 _"I'll see you later, then. Love you sweetie!"_

"I love you too, Dad!" She smiled as she clicked the phone off, then turned around to receive the shock of her young life.

"Well, what do you think?" said Woo. Sandra shrieked.

 ** _"Augh! You-you're . . ._ _naked_ _!"_**

"But I've never worn clothes! You've never reacted like this before!"

 ** _"Ohmigosh ohmigosh ohmigosh! Throw this blanket over yourself! Quick!"_**

"It _is_ kinda chilly without fur!"

 _ **"Augh! Augh! My eyes! My poor virgin eyes!"**_

"Don't you think you're getting a bit carried away? I want you to tell me what I look like!" Sandra covered her eyes with her hand.

"Go . . . go upstairs, and look in the mirror! Yeesh!"

Woo headed upstairs to Sandra's room, while Sandra rushed off to her dad's room to dig up an old sweat outfit and some shoes. She had to get him out of the house before her father got home. He'd never understand why there was a strange naked boy in her bedroom while he was gone.

"Here, put these clothes on while I get dressed. They may be a little baggy, but we're in a hurry!" Woo continued preening himself before the mirror.

"You hardly even looked at me yet! I think I'd give Cloud a run for his money!"

"For your information," she said, still averting her eyes, "there is no one on Earth who can possibly replace my Clou . . ." Woo spun her around.

"Okay, now don't hold back! How do I look?" Sandy held her hands up in front of her face.

"Woo, how old are you in human years?"

"I'm guessing about 15 or 16!" She breathed a sigh of relief.

"You _are_ cute, I'll give you that, . . . but you're _too old_ for me! Now if you don't mind, I need to get dressed." She stepped into the bathroom, and locked the door.

 _"Did she suddenly develop modesty now?"_ He snickered as he tried to slip into Richard's old sweat pants.

 **The Gauntlet**

They hurried out to the second-hand store, for there was no point in getting new clothes if they were to be discarded at the end of the day. It was on the other side of the city park, a known hangout for Cloud's family, and Sandra wondered if she should risk taking human Woo through _that_ minefield. She wanted to apologize to Cloud if she saw him, but would need an explanation for the cute guy she was dragging around by his hand. This was tai chi exercise day, and she knew his mom and little sister would be there also, but she wanted to get him alone to explain who Woo was. She left Woo to sit on a bench while she looked for Cloud.

As he waited, a little girl came by, sat down, then narrowed her eyes, scowling at him. She crossed her arms and sat silently, frowning and glaring. Woo fidgeted, twiddling his thumbs nervously. Soon her mother came to get her, looking as cross and suspicious as her little girl.

"Yuna, honey, please do not disturb the young man. Take it from me, you are no match for him."

"But . . ."

"No buts, dear. His skill level is way beyond _both_ of ours!" Sandra, not having found Cloud, came running back.

"Hi, Mrs. Williams, Yuna! I see you've met my cousin, Woo . . . dy, from Oregon!"

"Your _cousin_? Oh thank heavens! I thought Cloud had upset you enough that you went out and got yourself another boyfriend!"

Woo took her aside, and whispered in her ear, _"Cousin 'Woody', . . . from Oregon?"_

 _"I had to say something, otherwise they would have killed you!"_

"Is Cloud here today? I didn't see him in tai chi class!" Ye Thuza sighed.

"Oh, he's been feeling badly all morning, and didn't want to come. I figure it had to do with something between the two of you the other day! If he has hurt your feelings, Sandra, tell me, and I will take an ear off of him!" Sandra's eyes opened wide. She could never tell if Cloud's mother was joking or not.

"Uh, that won't be necessary, Mrs. W., it's just a misunderstanding!" Little Yuna jumped up.

"If he's not your new boyfriend, can I have him? He's really cute, and Mom thinks he's some martial arts killing machine!" Woo looked at Sandy, and gave a shoulder shrug in surprise, not knowing how they got that idea.

"If you doubt me, Yuna, take out your wooden practice knives, and try to stab him!" Quick as a flash, the little girl reacted, almost gleefully, aiming for Woo's face, and just as quickly, Woo instinctively disarmed her, and handed the wooden daggers back. Yuna took them with a look of awe, and admiration.

"Whoa! Mom, I think I'm in love!" Ye Thuza wagged her finger at her.

"Not so fast! Before I allow him your hand in marriage, he'll have to get through me first! Name your poison, young man!" This time, Sandy took Woo aside.

 _"How are you doing this?!"_

 _"I don't know! Seeoahtlamakaskay said she'd put me on equal footing with your friends! Maybe this is a part of what she meant!"_

"Aikido! Judo! Jiujitsu Kung Fu! Choose one, or choose all!"

"Jiujitsu!" Without a moments hesitation, Ye Thuza attempted to wrap her arms around his neck from behind the bench, for a quick choke hold, but Woo was quicker, pushing her elbow up out of the way, then slipping his head out. He grabbed her by the wrist in a painful grip, and had her in an arm lock she could not get out of. She tapped out.

"My god, you're fast! It's like you have . . . !"

 _"Animal reflexes?"_

"Exactly!" she exclaimed, "There's not many who could escape my surprise attack, especially from the rear! You must tell me who your master is!"

"I-I'm . . . self-taught?"

"A lone wolf, huh? They say that's the most dangerous kind! Like, Musashi . . . !" Sandy interrupted Ye Thuza's history lesson.

"Excuse us, Mrs. Williams, but we really need to get Woody some new clothes! His are full of holes!"

"So I noticed!"

"That's because I spend a lot of time in the forest . . . !" Woo grinned.

"So that's where you hone your skills, and meditate! I like that! We must visit you one day, and we will _all_ have a bout with you! Including Cloud!"

"Oh! If you see Cloud, could you please tell him I want to talk to him?" said the blonde girl.

"Certainly! And if you object to him losing an ear, I can always remove something less conspicuous! A pinky finger, maybe?" Sandy smiled nervously, and waved goodbye.

Yuna blew Woo a kiss. "Don't forget! We're gonna get married! Right, Mom?"

"Right. As soon as you get your doctorate in extra-dimensional interstellar travel."

 _"Aww, M-o-o-o-m!"_

Woo turned to give one last wave. "Cloud's little sister is cute! She wants to marry me . . . whatever that means!" Sandra began to walk faster.

"Don't you even think about it! She's _way_ too young for you!"

"Huh. It's hard to judge human age in this form!"

"Well, at least she thinks you're cute enough to marry! How old were you when you met Lily?"

"About eight months?"

"Forget I asked . . ."

Sandra looked around. It was a large park, and a very popular place to hang out. She saw some of her classmates, and a few of Cloud's friends wandering around, then it struck her. _"Ohmigawd! If anyone sees_ _me_ _with Woo, and not Cloud, there's going to be a hell of a lot of explaining to do!"_ The girl grabbed Woo by the hand, and made an orderly march towards the stores. The boy raccoon was attracting attention from some of the other girls from her school, who were already smiling, waving at him, and blowing kisses. Woo was far too good looking than she was willing to admit. The last thing she wanted was to have him spotted by either Larisa, or Zoey and Michelle. They made the second-hand store without incident, and she exhaled a sigh of relief. A nice hoodie or a wind breaker would cover the only vestige of his raccoon heritage: his silver and black striped hair.

"Stay close, Woo, we need to be in and out of here quickly!" She headed straight for the workout clothes, but Woo was already wandering off. _"Urrgh! Guess I'll have to figure it out myself!"_ It wouldn't be very hard. Woo was a little taller than Cloud, but shorter than her dad, with a similar build, and she'd already gone clothes shopping with Cloud. She found a reasonably priced jacket with a hood, and went to look for the wayward Woo, to try it on.

Since it was nearly Halloween, the stock clerks were already filling the racks with masks, and assorted retro clothes for costumes. A simple, black Lone Ranger mask made the raccoon boy laugh, and he put it on along with a pair of animal ear head band to complete the look. It amused him that he had to dress up to look like a raccoon once more. Sandra began walking towards him, but stopped as he began to sidle up to a familiar brunette whom she had not noticed when they first walked in: Michelle. She was chewing loudly on a stick of gum as she browsed the racks, looking for that one perfect mask.

Sandy ducked down below the clothes racks, and pretended to be checking price tags while watching for Michelle's conjoined twin, Zoey. Zoey didn't seem to be with her, so Sandra ran around the back of a wall of gondolas the next aisle over, to listen in on their conversation, and try to get his attention before Michelle sank her hooks into him.

"That mask really makes your eyes stand out!" he told her. That made Michelle look up in surprise, and giggle, as she wasn't expecting a compliment from a total stranger.

"Thanks! I saw these Venetian masks here last year, but they sold out fast! I was hoping they would have them again this year!" Woo removed his ears and mask, and Michelle immediately took notice. "That hair of your's looks almost natural! You must spend a lot of time maintaining it! Can I touch it?" He turned his head and bent lower. "Are you from around here?" she asked.

"No, I'm here visiting relatives!"

"Where ya from?"

"Oregon!" he said, following Sandra's lead.

"I have relatives in Oregon! Whereabouts?" Her query caught him off his guard since he really didn't know the geography. But he did remember a show that Sandra liked to watch.

" _Gravity Falls_!" he smiled confidently. Sandy restrained a growl from deep down in her throat.

[ _"Why that sneaky little rodent! He's_ _flirting_ _with her!"_ ]

"Is that even a real place?!" Michelle responded.

"As real as I am! My name's Woody, by the way!"

"And I'm Michelle! Are you here long?"

"I'm here for the day, then I'll be leaving. Sorry!"

"Would you mind if I took you around a little while? Show you some sights?"

"Sure! If you want to!"

[Sandy: _**NO! NO NO NOOOO!**_ ] Sandra knew Michelle only wanted to show him off to her friends, and that included Zoey. The brunette wrapped her arm around Woo's, and walked him out of the store. Sandy began tugging on her hair, pulling it around her face.

 _"She's going straight to Zoey, I just know it!"_ She paid for Woo's hoodie, and a pair of dark glasses, then slipped both on as she rushed out to follow them. Sandra stayed just out of earshot, but she could tell they were having fun, talking like they were old friends.

Zoey was having a bit of breakfast outside a sidewalk cafe a block away when she saw her friend coming up the walk with her arm locked around some new guy. She sighed, and gave a disapproving look, one borne of possessive jealousy. Michelle was not only her friend, but the object of her affection as well, even if she didn't realize it yet.

"Where have you been, Michelle? I've been waiting for the past twenty minutes!"

"Sorry dear, but I was checking out the newest masks at the thrift store, and I ran into this little number! Woody, this is my BFF Zoey!"

"My pleasure, Zoey, but tell me, are all the girls here as beautiful as you two?" Zoey was somewhat startled by his cheesy line, and felt her cheeks flush. Even if she was into girls, she had to admit this guy was damn good looking, maybe even enough for her to change orientations. She shook her head to drive the thoughts from her mind.

"No, like any other town, we have our share of nerds . . . like the one that followed you guys out of the thrift store!" Woo and Michelle turned their heads quickly, but Sandy had disappeared into a crowd crossing the street. She was now much too far away to listen in on their conversation, but maybe she could try and get his attention when the other two weren't looking.

"Woody's only here for today, and I told him I'd show him the sights!" As much as Zoey was beginning to like Woo, she gave Michelle an impatient glare.

"You forget that we have a fashion club function to volunteer at in an hour, and you can't bring Woody in because he's a guy, and there's going to be a lot of half-dressed bodies backstage!"

"Aw, that's right!" Michelle placed her hand on his chest, "I'm sorry Woody, but I forgot all about my prior commitments, but if you don't mind, I'd like to make it up to you." She grabbed him around the shoulders, pulling him to her, and planted a deep, lip smacking kiss. Sandra, who was sitting at a bus stop across the street, felt her blood run cold. "Yum!" Michelle licked her lips, and pulled a note pad from her bag and wrote her number on it. "Call me, the next time you're in town!" Zoey rolled her eyes at the demonstration, but also got an idea.

". . . And since I was the one to break the bad news, I'll be giving you one of my own!" she said. She stood quickly, and threw her arms around the raccoon boy's neck, surprising both Woo and Michelle. Sandra, across the street, jumped up, yanking on her hair again, and stalked off. [Sandy: _"Wait til I get my hands on him!"_ ] "I'm sorry, but we really must get going!" she said apologetically, "It's been real nice meeting you!"

"Likewise, I'm sure!"

As the two girls started to leave, Sandy was set to dash across the street, but suddenly saw the one person she did not want Woo to meet in his human form: Larisa. Sandra was forced to retreat once more, hiding inside a group of people waiting for their bus to arrive. She paced back and forth, not wanting to lose sight of Woo, but as the bus left, the two were nowhere to be seen. [Sandy: _Calm down, Sandra. If you were Larisa with some handsome guy you just bumped into, where would you take him for a first date? The amusement park! Of course!_ ]

North ran as fast as she could. It was getting too cold for most people, and the amusement park rides were mostly empty. If they were there, they could spend the rest of the afternoon just hitting the rides nonstop. There were also the food stands, and knowing Woo, his stomach would find it's way to any one of them. With no other clues to go on, Sandra headed for the refreshment booths. Once there, she caught a glimpse of Woo sharing a ball of cotton candy with Larisa. She walked after them while keeping a distance. They were headed for the merry-go-round, which in warmer weather, would be crawling with kids. It was a safe ride, open and airy, and she could keep an eye on them from the bench nearby without being too noticeable. Woo bought tickets, which she thought odd because she never gave him any money to spend. They mounted two colorful ponies as the ride began to spin, and she could hear them laughing as the calliope played. _"Good,"_ she sighed, _"at least they're arms length away from each other!"_ Her phone suddenly went off, and she jumped. It was her dad.

 _"Hi sweetie! I saw your note on the coffee table, and you cleaned the house and washed all the dishes before you left! I'm really proud of you! Thanks!"_

"Uh, yeah sure! No problem, Dad!" Sandy remembered nothing. Seeoahtlahmakaskay must have taken care of everything before they got up this morning.

 _"By the way, did you happen to see my old sweat jacket? The one I can't fit anymore?"_

"The one with the cougar on the front? I'm borrowing it because it's comfortable, and-and I didn't want to wear my heavy coat today!"

 _"What a coincidence! I keep your allowance in the vest pocket, so that saves me the trouble of giving it to you for being such a good daughter! I'll be going to the office later this afternoon, so I'll give you a call before I leave!"_

"Is this another excuse to see Melody again, hmmm?"

 _"Ha ha ha! Guess I can't hide anything from you, sweetheart!"_

"Aw, it's okay, Dad. I understand!" She hung up, and shook her head. _"That furry little free-loader is spending_ _my_ _allowance on Larisa!"_ When she looked up from her phone, the merry-go-round had stopped, and her two friends had disappeared once more. Another frantic search ensued, and Sandy saw them at the top of the ferris wheel. This time Larisa had her head against Woo's shoulder. Sandra began a muffled scream. _**"Gah! Ah! AHHHH! NOOOO!"**_ Now she felt ill, and ran to a nearby restroom to throw up.

Meanwhile, at the top of the ferris wheel, Larisa and Woo noticed Sandra's plaintive cry. "You hear something, Woody, dear?"

"Sounded like the anguished scream of a possum, getting sprayed in the face by a skunk!" Liz burst out laughing just as the operator unhooked their safety bar.

"Ha ha ha ha! You sure are funny! Ready for another ride?"

"Okay! Where shall we go next?"

"Let's go through . . . the _Tunnel of Love!_ " she hopped about, excitedly.

"A tunnel?" Woo's eyes lit up, "Great! We can find all kinds of yummy things in there!"

"How are you at protecting frightened females? It's kinda dark and scary in there!" Larisa clutched at his arm, feigning terror.

"Hey! There's no need to be afraid with me around!" he patted her hand, "I'll save you from whatever monsters are in there!"

Lizzy smiled happily as they went to purchase their tickets, and climbed into the boat with raccoon boy in tow. Sandra came out of bathroom in time to see her two friends disappearing into the tunnel.

 _"Auugghh! Th-that's even worse!"_ Sandra imagined Larisa had been through the tunnel with dozens of guys, and was now clinging to Woo like moss on a rock. _"She probably has a boat with her own name on it!"_ She purchased a ticket for the next boat so she could follow them closely, but she was already three boats away. In the dark, she could hear them talking.

"It's chilly in here! Mind if I snuggle up to you?"

"Can I put my arm over you, also?" Sandy began bonking her head against the prow of her boat.

"Of course! But it's going to cost you a kiss!" He leaned towards her.

"Do you give change back? 'Cuz my kisses are made of solid gold!" Sandra face-palmed herself, and nearly fell over backwards from his cheesy attempt at flirtation. Woo was a newbie in the art of the flirt, but Larisa was eating it up.

"Then, I'll have to give you back as much change as you want!" She fluttered her eyelids at him as they drew closer. Her phone rang just as their lips were about to meet. _"Drat!"_ It was Sandra.

"Hi Liz! Listen, I wanted to apologize for the way I acted yesterday. It was kinda silly of me, and now I'm feeling sheepish!" She covered her phone with her jacket so that she couldn't be heard from three boats away.

 _"There's no need to apologize, Sandy, I understand completely! Sooner or later your boobies are gonna grow in, then you'll be at least a six!"_

"[ _Why you little . . .!_ ] *Ahem* Yeah, I mean, I can hardly wait! Ha ha ha ha!"

 _"By the way, I seem to have stumbled across a long lost relative of yours. He's gorgeous, and so funny! To bad he's a total gentleman! I'm having a hard time bringing him over to the dark side!"_

"He-he is? Is-is his name Woody, by chance?"

 _"Yep! From Oregon, and complete with the most amazing stripped hair on his head that I've ever seen! It looks almost natural!"_

"Oh good! Could you tell him to come home? My dad and I are taking him out for dinner, then we're seeing him off at the airport!"

 _"You're lucky I rescued him from Zoey and Michelle, then! If they stuck their harpoons in him, he'd still be in their clutches!"_

"Thanks, Larisa! You're a life saver! I owe you one!"

 _"I'm glad you feel that way, because I'm thinking of assembling my own male harem, and Woody would make a wonderful first addition!"_

"Sorry, but that's _not_ gonna happen!"

 _"Cloud would make a fine substitute, then!"_

" _You_ _can't_ _have him!_ Think about Landon!"

 _"Landon . . . who, now?"_

 _"You're not serious!"_

 _"Relax, Sandy! I'm just pulling your chains! And by the way, shame on you for keeping Woody a secret from me!"_ Sandra looked up ahead, but could no longer see Larisa's head.

"Where are you guys, anyway? You sound like you're in a tunnel!"

 _"Yeah, the 'Tunnel of Love' at the amusement park! I've got my head in his lap, and Woody's giving me a belly rub! It feels fantastic! No wonder your raccoon likes it so much!"_

"Errgh! Just tell him to come home so he can wash up before we go out to dinner!"

 _"Can I come over and scrub his back? Bet he'd like that!"_ Sandra sighed.

"You'd probably enjoy it a whole lot more!"

 _"Ahhh! You know me so well, my dear! [A little higher, Woody my love! Don't be shy, . . . I won't bite! *giggling*]_." Sandra cursed under her breath . . . again. _"Why are you whispering, Sandy? You sound like you're talking in your closet!"_

"Because there are a couple of _jerks_ in front of me that I want to strangle, but I'm trying to remain lady-like!"

 _"Huh! You must be at the supermarket checkout line! I know what you mean!"_

"Yeah! Now could you please send Woody back home? We're waiting!"

"If you insist!" Larisa sighed before hanging up. "Looks like you're wanted back at the ranch, Woody! Thanks so much for such a wonderful time!"

"It's been a pleasure for me, also! We must do this again sometime!"

"Next time we won't tell your cousin!"

Larisa kissed him on the cheek as they got out of the boat, and waved goodbye. She was never one to obsess over any boy, and quickly walked away, not even once looking back. To her, life was too precious, and too short, given her medical condition. She would never treat any of the boys she went out with, as one of her "conquests". Like her, they were merely fellow travelers along the path of life.

Woo cocked his head, and folded his arms across his chest as he watched her disappear around the corner. As a raccoon, she often confided her problems to him when they were alone, thinking that he did not understand a word she said, telling him things she would not dare tell even Sandra. It gave him insight into her true character. He felt two hands pushing him from behind. It was Sandy.

"Come along, buster, I'm taking you home! You've got a lot of nerve, ditching me like that! I'm supposed to be looking after you!"

"You allow me into the forest on my own, how is this any different? You shouldn't worry, Sandy, I know how to take care of myself!"

"It's not just that! You suddenly become human, and you're attracting the attention of all the girls in my school! And then you end up kissing the prettiest ones! If Yuna was old enough, you would probably have kissed her, too!"

"But I like Larisa! She's always nice to me, and gives a mean belly-rub! I trust her!"

" _Nooooo!_ She's the _'flirt-meister'_ , and totally without inhibitions! No guy in school can resist her charms! She'll have you eating out of her hands in no time!"

"I do that now! Don't you think you're being a _liiittle_ over-protective of me? I think Seeoahtlahmakaskay intended for me to experience human life so you and I could better understand each other!"

"I-I just didn't want her to break your furry little heart, that's all, b-but I don't want you to break her heart, either. She has enough troubles of her own, . . . and I want to keep all my friends safe. Of all my friends, you're the only one who lives with me, and I feel responsible for your well-being . . ." Sandy turned away, as if to wipe a tear from her eye, "I care about you, Woo. Seeoatlahmakaskay made a mistake, and I don't think you realize how attractive you are to girls like Larisa, Michelle, and Zoey!"

"Well, to be fair, only Michelle seemed interested in me. Zoey wasn't too keen, and seemed annoyed when Michelle brought me along!"

"Really?"

"When Michelle kissed me, she shoved the gum she was chewing into my mouth! And when Zoey kissed me, I placed that gum into _her_ mouth!"

" _So now you're all potential mates for each other?!_ That's disgusting! You don't know where that Michelle's been!" Woo shrugged his shoulders.

"It's not unusual for raccoons to have multiple partners! I figured it was a human custom I wasn't aware of, . . . passing gum around from mouth-to-mouth! After all, Michelle seemed pretty excited about it, and Zoey seemed like she wanted in on it, too!"

"That Zoey's a strange one . . . why would she want Michelle's gum?"

"I don't know, . . . maybe there was a lot of flavor still left in it?"

"And what about _Larisa_?" Woo took a deep breath, and let it out.

"Larisa's . . . complex. On the surface, it looks like she throws caution to the wind, and only _seems_ flirtatious! She has a lot of secrets, but won't tell them to just anyone. As her best friend, she trusts you the most, but I think there's things she hasn't even told you yet!"

"Well aren't you the observant one! Did she divulge any of her _'secrets'_ to you?"

"As a raccoon, she's told me a lot of things! You have to sit her down and talk to her. She really needs your sympathetic ear!" Sandra sighed.

"I guess you're right. Maybe I am too uptight about you being alone with her."

"Yeah! And you're acting like a mother hen!" They both laughed, and Sandra turned her face to hide her embarrassment. "Sandy, you really haven't looked at me since this morning. I thought you wanted to see what I looked like as a human!"

"Er, well, you were running around naked most of the morning, and I didn't want you to think I was gawking at you!"

"Is that the only reason? You walk around the bedroom all the time, with only a towel hanging over your shoulders, but I never stare at you!"

"Dang it, Woo! Besides my dad, you're the only other guy I've ever seen without clothes on, and-and I wasn't prepared to see you like that!" Woo took several steps away from her, then turned around.

"Be honest, now! Am I as cute as Cloud?" the raccoon turned human smiled smugly. Sandra turned away from him, a conflicted look filled her eyes.

"Please don't make me answer that, Woo, . . . I-I love Cloud, and . . . and . . ." her voice trailed off, ". . . you're just a fantasy . . ." Woo raised an eyebrow, and puzzled for a few moments before managing a weak smile.

"Okay, I think I understand now. I'm sorry, Sandy, I didn't mean to press you. But I'm really glad you told me." He wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly. "I can't get my arms all the way around you as a raccoon, so just this once, if you don't mind, I'd like to give you a real, human-type hug." He held her close, and whispered into her ear, "You're wrong, you know, I didn't get to kiss the ' _prettiest'_ girl in your school!"

For an instant, Sandra's eyes grew large, then she smiled. She snuggled into his embrace, resting her forehead against his shoulder for a moment, before looking up into his face. She traced her fingertips along his cheeks. "Woo?" she said softly as they both drew closer.

"Yes, Sandra?"

"Your mask, . . . it's starting to reappear!"

With that, the raccoon goddess whisked the pair back to the North's living room, where they were both still asleep on the floor. _"I think that will be enough for today!"_

Seeoahtlahmakaskay smiled, pressing a thoughtful finger into her chin. _"Hmm, did I push this little one too hard? Poor Woo! Perhaps I should have set some ground rules before I sent you two off! Because you are so charming, your companion imagines you to be this outrageously handsome, human boy! Tee hee! There's really no way for me to show you what your human self would look like, so I must depend on Sandra's imagination to picture you!"_

She then proceeded to stuff a piece of cheesecake she had pilfered from the fridge, into her mouth. _"I've waited so long for this! It's heavenly!"_

 **End Chapter 2**

 **A/N: A _fantasy_? What did she mean by that? Did she mean she fantasizes about Woo, or that See-o-ahtlah-maka-skay deliberately made Woo better looking than he should have been? Who knows! Draw your own conclusions!**

 **In this story, Zoey's sexual orientation is not generally known, except to Larisa, so we will stay with that!**

 **What, you've never played "pass the gum" (or lifesaver!) with your boy/girlfriend?! Hard candy lasts longest!**


	3. Lily's Story

**I do not own any of the characters from Sandra and Woo! They belong to Oliver Knörzer!**

 **A/N: Awkwardness continues!**

 **Woo to You Too!**

 **Chapter 3: Lily's Story**

Sandy felt like she had died, and gone to heaven. There was this incredible feeling of euphoria spreading through her body that made her feel like she was slowly melting into a pleasured puddle of goo. She reached upwards, stretching her taut muscles over her young frame. A warm breath grazed her face, one that she had grown so accustomed to over the past several years. It was Woo, back to his own furry self.

"Good morning, Sandra!" he said, and his friendly eyes, and whiskered face, reassured her that everything was fine . . . except for one thing.

"Why is it still morning?"

"I don't know. Seeoahtlahmakaskay can alter time, so I think she returned us to the same moment that her enchantment began. You were still asleep, so I thought I'd give you a belly rub till you got up!"

"Belly rub? Is that what feels so . . . **_Eeek! Wh-what happened to all my clothes?!"_**

"You don't need 'em, you've got fur now! I think you shrank out of them this morning, when you were transformed! You're laying on them now!"

". . . Y-you're _touching_ my privates . . . !"

"Yeah! You look great! The guys are gonna freak when they see you! You'll be the first blue-eyed, blonde raccoon, ever! And Larisa's gonna be so jealous! Look! You've got eight nipples! Eat your heart out, Liz!"

 ** _"Stop touching my tits!"_** Sandy stood up, and smoothed over her belly fur, to conceal them. If not for the fur on her face, she'd be glowing red. "Hmph! The nerve!"

Woo pulled his paws away quickly, surprised by her outburst. "Boy, you're real cranky, you know! Just like any female raccoon facing their first mating season!"

"But it's fall! Isn't mating season in the spring?!"

"Did I mention, Seeoahtlahmakaskay is also the raccoon goddess of fertility? She can make it happen anywhere, anytime, and for anyone!"

"B-but I don't _want_ to mate with just _anyone_! _I'm_ saving myself for _Cloud_!"

"You did ask me earlier about what mating season was like. She must have overheard you!"

"I wonder what else she heard!" The girl walked up to a full length mirror in the hall to check herself out, swishing her tail side-to-side. "Neat-O! So what do we do next?"

"Her intention was that you not only look like a raccoon, but also live the part, so I'm taking you into the forest to meet my friends, Shadow and Sid! You hungry?"

"Famished!"

"Good! We'll start out at the stream, and rustle up some grubs!"

"G-grubs?! _Ewww!_ How about we finish off the leftover pizza instead!" Woo pretended not to hear her.

"Earthworms, too! You know what they say, the early raccoon gets the worms! If we're lucky, we'll catch some crayfish, also! I'll show you how to shell 'em!" She stuck her tongue out. Her human mind wanted to retch, but her growing raccoon instincts were all for it.

"May as well live the part, huh? Let's do this!"

They started out in the back yard, climbing over the fence. There was a stream not far away, and that's where their hunt began. Woo started turning over rocks, finding an assortment of water bugs, and shared his finds with Sandra. She looked them over, squirming and wiggling, trying to get away. The girl held them at arms length, then closed her eyes before taking a bite. It was an odd feeling, having tiny, spindly legs thrashing about in her mouth, giving their final kicks as she crunched down on them, then disappearing down her throat. _Not too bad_ , she thought, definitely different fare from what she was used to. There was a distinctive flavor she couldn't quite put her finger on. She needed more. Sandra started turning rocks over on her own, which brought a smile to Woo. He watched with pride, like a father would, after having taught his kits the basic survival skills, and seeing them pass with flying colors. Behind his back was a fat earthworm he had intended to eat out of sight from her, because he didn't know how she would react to his usual forest fare. Little water bugs were sort of like shrimp, something Sandra ate on a regular basis. An earthworm, on the other hand, was slimy and full of mud. It was an acquired taste, eating dirt, but one that came naturally to raccoons. He held it up in front of her, and her eyes grew big.

"Is that . . . for me?"

"Only if you want it!"

"I don't want the whole thing, I just want a bite! I'll split it with you!" Woo chuckled, bit the poor worm in half, and handed the remainder to Sandra. She swished it around in the stream before stuffing it into her mouth.

"How do you like it?"

"It's a little gritty, like fresh clams," she licked her fingers, ". . . you know, when they haven't been cleaned out thoroughly. I could learn to like this!" The golden raccoon splashed some water on her face, and smiled. "What else do raccoons eat?"

"We like crickets and grasshoppers, but you're not going to find many of them this time of year. I love cicadas, very nutritious, but they're seasonal also. Nuts and berries are nice to eat, and bird eggs, too! We'll eat just about anything that's not too fast or big! If you're done, we can find more food along the way to Shadow and Sid's place!"

"Okay!"

"I must say you've been an awfully good sport about all this, and you'd make a proper raccoon in any forest!"

"Didn't want to disappoint you, besides, there's something about being in this body that makes me feel like . . . a real raccoon!" She flexed her muscles, and gave him a sly grin. The girl suddenly pounced on him, and the two began wrestling, biting and nipping each other. It was all in good fun as they chased each other down through the meadow, beyond which Shadow and Sid lived. Woo had often wished Sandy could play with him raccoon style, and here she was, chomping on his tail, while they both rolled around in the grass. He was beginning to regret his wish, for though she was now the same size as him, she retained the strength of a human four or five times his size. Along with her faster animal body, Sandy was now more than he could handle. He was quickly being overpowered, pinned down by his friend, who straddled him, snarling.

 _"I give up! I give up!"_ Sandra giggled.

"Heh heh! That's pay back for tearing off my clothes that one time!" Woo relaxed, breathing a sigh of relief.

"For a second there, I thought you were gonna eat me alive!" She drew closer, sniffing around his face, and neck.

"Did I scare you? Isn't this how you and Lily play fight?"

"Yeah, but for some reason, you're a lot stronger than me! I don't know if I could have held you off!" A red spot marked the side of his neck, and she parted his fur. One of the scratches she had given him had begun to drip a small amount of blood. Sandra licked it without hesitation, knowing that saliva contained small amounts of anti-biotic, and blood clotting properties. She was living the part of a forest creature, and seemed to be enjoying it. Woo, meanwhile, closed his eyes. Her rough tongue on his skin was not an unpleasant feeling, reminding him of a time when his own mother cleaned him in a similar fashion. It tickled, causing him to squirm, and giggle.

"Hey! Keep still, you! I'm not done yet!" she scolded him as he tried to get away.

"But it tickles! Ha ha ha!" She backed up, getting off his stomach.

"I'm sorry, but I feel like a little girl again! I can't remember the last time I romped through this meadow! Winter's coming, and soon all of this will be covered in snow! I'll be human again long before that happens! I have to make the most of this!" She stopped suddenly, her ears and whiskers twitching. "I sense we are not alone in this grassy field!" Woo put his nose to the air.

"Mice! Field mice! Lots of them!" They stood quietly, watching the mice as they prepared for the coming winter by packing their nests with acorns, nuts, and seeds. Food they would no longer have any use for. "Let's catch 'em!"

"I'm _way_ ahead of you!" Sandra already had one caught between her toes.

In a short while, a pile of mice lay before them. Woo ate a few right away, and scooted over to Sandy, dangling a dead mouse in front of her face. She began to blush.

"Is-is that your 'sizing up' gift to me?" He quickly withdrew the mouse.

"W-what?! No! I . . . i-it's just that you caught most of them, but you haven't tried any!"

"I've eaten worms and bugs, but I don't think I'm ready for something warm-blooded, and . . . 'cute'!" Woo tossed the mouse into the air and caught it in his mouth.

"Heh heh! Suit yourself! You're pretty good at being a raccoon, but I can't eat all this by myself!"

"What about Lily?"

"She's mad at me for dropping Vega and Arcturus. I can't get within a hundred feet of the den, or she'll bite my ears off!" The golden furred one laughed.

"You mean you'll get an _'earful'_?"

"No, I mean she'll _literally_ bite my ears off! Seriously, you don't want an angry momma raccoon on your case!"

"How about we bring the mice to Echo and Shadow? I'm sure they'll be happy to take them! And Sid should be just as pleased to have all these nuts and seeds, too!" They found some plastic bags blowing about in the wind, and filled them with the days catch, then they were off to meet Woo's friends.

 **The Watchers**

"I've never met your forest friends before. Do you think they'll like me?"

"Yeah, sure! Who wouldn't!" Woo was looking towards the forest edge. There were other eyes on them as they made their way to Shadow's den.

"I saw those guys!" Sandra remarked, "They showed up when we started catching the mice. I think they were planning to hunt in this meadow, but we interrupted their plans. There's only two of them, though."

"Your senses are really sharp for a forest newbie! I didn't see them until we got close to the edge of the field."

"Do you know them?"

"It's a big forest, and there's lots of other raccoons, but males are usually solitary. I've dealt with this pair before, the last time was when I first met Lily." He recalled the incident from a year ago, "The last I saw of them, they were headed for Saskatchewan!" Sandy giggled.

"Maybe they weren't wanted there, either!" They continued their trek into the woods.

Shadow's den was not much further. They could hear the yipping and yowling of his two kits as they played. They had just finished their meal for the day, part of a hind quarter from a deer Shadow had gotten off the roadside, and everyone was stuffed. Woo shouted ahead so as not to surprise them.

"Hey everybody! It's me, Woo, and I've brought a friend!" Suddenly the den went quiet, and the sound of scurrying kits could be heard. Shortly, Shadow stuck his head out of the opening.

"Is that you, Woo? Who's that with you?"

"This is Sandra, the human girl I live with!" The fox did a double take.

"Sandra?! The human you're always talking about? Why is she a raccoon?"

"It's a long story, and I don't have much time to talk. I just wanted to introduce her to my friends! I'll tell you about it another time!" Sandra held up her bag full of mice.

"We caught a bunch of mice, and we were wondering if you'd like some of them!" Shadow politely turned the offer down.

"We've got plenty of food right now," said Shadow, "mice are little, so they won't last long here! Why don't you bring 'em to Lily's place? Her kits are _always_ hungry!"

"Have you seen Sid around? We took all the mice's winter stores since they won't be needing them anymore!" Sandra held up a big bag of seeds and acorns. "We think he could use these!"

"Eh, he went out hunting with his _'carnivorous'_ girlfriend, Ruth! They've started living together, and because of him, she's started to take a liking to seeds and nuts. I'm sure they'll appreciate the extra food! Squirrels hibernate during the winter, so they'll need to fatten up before then!" Shadow's eyes began to glaze over, and drool dripped from his lips, ". . . fatten up . . ."

"Shame on you, Shadow! Isn't Sid supposed to be a friend of your's?"

"Aww, he's like a little brother to me! I wouldn't harm a hair on his head! Ruth on the other hand . . . !"

"Ehh! Predators! Could you please see to it that Sid gets these?" The fox snapped to attention, and saluted her.

"Yes, ma'am! And might I say, you are certainly one of the most gorgeous raccoons I've ever met! I should like to meet you one day in your human form!" Sandy put her paw to her lips, and giggled.

"Well, you're certainly a charming one! I can see where foxes get their reputation from!"

 **Lily's Hollow**

The pair continued their journey through the forest towards Lily's den. Woo held her back for a moment.

"You know if you go in there, you're on your own! She'll tear my tail off if she gets ahold of me!"

"Oh, I'm sure you're exaggerating, but I'm bringing a peace offering, plus she knows me!"

"Not in your _raccoon skin_ , she doesn't! Look, I'll be outside, keeping my distance, but I'll come running if there's any trouble!"

"You worry too much! I'll be fine!"

"Maybe I'll try to find her dad, just in case!" He scampered off into the woods to look for Tibor.

Sandra approached the tree hollow cautiously. Woo's warning had her a little spooked, but the kits had grown up quite a bit, and if anything, Lily was being a bit over protective, sort of like she was with Woo as a human. The den, however, was quiet. She knew everyone was in there, though, and were hiding from her. Like Shadow and Echo, who smelled her human scent, Lily must have sensed her coming, and sent the kids to take cover.

"Hello, Lily? I know you're in there, . . . it's me, Sandra, and I brought some food for you and the kits!" A shiny black nose slowly poked it's way out of the hollow, and shortly a surprised Lily appeared.

"S-Sandra? B-but you're a raccoon! How did this happen?"

"Seeoahtlahmakaskay turned me into a raccoon for a day because Woo wanted to see what I would look like as one!"

"He did, did he?" Lily made a cross expression, "I wonder why!"

"Oh, don't be so suspicious! We both wanted to see what the other would look like as human and raccoon, but Seeoahtlahmakaskay thought it would be far more interesting if we were transformed to experience at least a little of each other's lives! Yesterday she turned Woo into a human, today it's my turn!" Lily began to sniff Sandra's fur. "Wh-what are you doing?"

"You still have that lingering human scent which made me think there was a hunter nearby. That's why I sent the kits into hiding. This is the same scent that comes from your home." She continued sniffing, and nuzzling Sandy's fur, "I must say, you look spectacular, like the color of autumn leaves! I've never seen a raccoon quite like you! And such a beautiful tail on you, too!" She lifted North's tail, feeling it's heft.

"Why, thank you! By the way I brought you and the kits some . . ."

"Would you mind bending over a bit?"

"W-what?! Why?!"

"We raccoons have scent glands at the base of our tails. It allows us to identify our friends."

"B-b-b-but . . . !"

"Oh don't worry, it's a raccoon thing. I just want a lick!" Lily pushed forward.

 ** _"YEEEOOW!"_** Sandra jumped three feet up the side of the tree hollow, while Lily smacked her lips.

"Just as I thought, lilac and honey!" Lily kept rubbing and admiring Sandy's tail, "Did Woo ever tell you the story of the Autumn Queen?" Sandy slowly climbed her way down the side of the wall. It was the second time today that some raccoon habit had caught her off guard.

"I've never heard him mention it before." The golden raccoon, brushed her haunches, trying to regain a bit of her human composure.

"I'm in the mood for telling a story! It goes something like this . . ." The kits, hearing a story to be told, emerged from their hiding places and sat with rapt attention at the foot of momma Lily, as she began her story. Auntie Sandy passed the bag of mice around, like popcorn, and they each grabbed a handful.

 **The Tale of the Autumn Princess**

"Once upon a time," Lily began, "in a magical forest, there was a kingdom, ruled by a wise king and his queen. They had a beautiful daughter whose hair was the color of the sunrise! They named her . . . Sunny! [Sandy: Ha ha. Very droll.] [Vega: Is she a human princess?] [Yes, Vega. Try not to interrupt Mommy's story, please!] Since she was a little girl, she loved to play with the forest animals, and they all loved her in return because of her kindness. She had no brothers nor sisters, and the animals were her only companions.

But their's was a small kingdom, and many days travel from the nearest other kingdoms. Sunny was a princess, however, and as she grew older, she became more and more beautiful, her fabulous hair being the stuff of legends, so when she became of the proper age, many princes came to court her, but she was very shy, and not used to seeing so many people at once. She devised a test for each of them. Each prince was taken to the garden pond where the princess often played with the forest creatures. They were each given a small basket of biscuits, cookies, and fruits, and asked to sit on the edge of the fountain, and wait for the princess to meet them. More often than not, the princes snacked on the food as they waited. The forest animals also waited patiently, hoping to receive even a few crumbs, but were offered none. Each time the princess came and saw the empty baskets, she looked to her forest friends, who shook their heads, indicating they were given nothing. _"I'm sorry, but I have made my decision."_ She bowed politely, as she dismissed each prince in turn.

The last prince was very handsome, but a haughty, arrogant, and impatient person. He took his basket, and was given the same instructions as everyone before him. _"What nonsense is this?! I am a prince royal, and they give me this peasant food and make me wait?!"_ He saw all the animals sitting at the edge of the garden, and flung the basket at them. They immediately scattered.

When Princess Sunny finally arrived, he confronted her. _"What is the meaning of this?! You give me a basket of garbage, and make me wait for you in this dreadful swamp, overrun with filthy animals?! I am not someone to be trifled with!"_ The princess bowed as before.

 _"I am sorry, good sir. I have lived many years in the palace, with few humans for companions, and am unfamiliar with the rituals of courtship, so I created this test for my suitors. These animals are my friends, and I can only assume that the way my future husband treats them, is the same way he will treat me."_

 _"Ha ha ha,"_ the prince laughed, _"So you compare yourself to these lowly creatures? As the greatest hunter in my kingdom, I will show you how_ ** _I_** _would treat them!"_ He drew his sword, intending to hurt and maim them, but all the forest animals pounced on him, and he was quickly disarmed. They then proceeded to chew his clothes off. Every last stitch.

Princess Sunny quickly threw her cape over him, and he got up so filled with rage and humiliation, he could not find his voice. He mounted his steed, and with his retainers beside him, hurried back to his own kingdom.

The angry prince rushed home to his mother, and told her his story. The indignant queen sought out the most powerful sorceress in the land to place a curse on the girl.

 _"If the princess prefers the company of animals, then she should become one herself!"_ she demanded, and tossed a handful of gold coins onto the witch's table, _"See to it that it happens!"_ The sorceress turned to her cabinet, and produced a vial of some innocuous looking liquid, and handed it to the queen.

 _"Pour this into the fountain of her garden retreat . . ."_ Without waiting to hear the mage's entire instructions, the queen turned, and left hurriedly. The sorceress shook her head in disgust.

 _"Such a rude woman! Even an old mage like myself, should be treated with some courtesy! One does not simply 'fling' payment onto a table! It should be handed . . . !"_ She noticed several of the coins thrown, were now missing. The queen had taken them when her back was turned! [Vega: What are 'coins', Momma? Is it something to eat?] [*sigh*] _"So that's how it will be!"_ said the sorceress, _"For half my fee, a half a spell, I'll cast for thee!"_ The sorceress assembled her potions and paraphernalia, and set about to create her spell. She waved a hand in front of her magic mirror. _"Before I proceed, let us have a look at this princess who prefers animals to the company of humans."_ The sorceress smiled as she watched the princess playing with her forest friends. _"Very pretty! I sympathize with you, Princess, for out here in the wilderness, my only companions are the forest creatures also, but since I have been paid, if only but a portion, a fitting spell I will weave for you."_ She removed from her shelf a large, and ancient tome, filled with magical spells. _"The queen wanted you turned into an animal, but, as she has paid me but a token of my full fee, I shall be kind to you. Now, what kind of animal shall you become? Something clever, perhaps, like a fox? They do have lovely pelts, and I must make you stand out from all the others!"_ The sorceress thought again. _"Maybe a squirrel instead? But they sleep all winter! Useless!"_ She searched her magical book once more. _"A raccoon! They are clever also, and clean! They wash their food and their paws! A raccoon you shall be! A golden raccoon, unlike any ever seen in the land!"_ A wave of her hand over the scrying bowl revealed Sunny's final form. _"When the first leaves of autumn begin to fall, Princess, you shall become one of the forest animals, a raccoon, the color of autumn leaves! You shall remain as such until the first snow arrives, then you shall revert back to a human once more. To break the spell, you must find your true love, otherwise the spell shall remain in place every year until such a time as you do."_ The sorceress made several magical circles on her tabletop as she made the incantation. _"Be mindful of who you choose, or who chooses you, for if your first love is human or forest raccoon, you will become one or the other, forever!"_

 **[Intermission]**

"Oh please! You're making this story up as you go, aren't you?"

"No, I'm not!" Lily giggled. "It's all part of raccoon lore!"

"It sounds _disturbingly_ coincidental, but there are no magical kingdoms in America!"

"There is in this story!"

"Why would raccoons even tell stories about humans?"

"Your kind have many stories about us! What's so different? Besides, that is a story for _another_ time! Now, do you want to hear the rest of the Autumn Queen?"

"I've come this far . . . and you're a really good story teller!"

"Thank you! Let us continue, but first, a bathroom break!" [All: Yay!]

 **End Chapter 3**

 **(to be continued!)**

 **A/N: Woo did make an earthworm sandwich, but Sandra mistakenly took it for something her father made, and brought it to school for her lunch.**

 **In "Honorary Raccoon" a reader made the suggestion of turning Sandra into a raccoon, and have Woo take her around and teach her proper raccoon behavior, so I'm sure this story has been on a lot of people's minds.**

 **Also, I really don't know how many nipples a raccoon has, but I couldn't find any references that could tell me, without me sounding weird! Cats have eight nipples, and they're about the same size, so I went with that!**

 **As far as real raccoon behavior goes, they tend to be polygamous, or promiscuous, so Lily has a right to be suspicious. Or maybe not. Plus I don't know if raccoons really have scent glands at the base of their tails, but I believe I read one comic where Sandy was about to remove Woo's scent glands with a very large knife (Raccoon Sweet and Sour, #141) because he had accidentally posted raccoon porn on her site!**

 **I hope you guys got the Sunny/Sandy reference!**


	4. Trophy Bride

**I do not own any of the characters from Sandra and Woo! They belong to Oliver Knözer!**

 **A/N: Sandra is about to become a very popular raccoon celebrity!**

 **Woo to You Too!**

 **Chapter 4: Trophy Bride**

" **One of us! One of us!"**

"Now then, where did I leave off? Ah, yes! The witch's spell!" Lily sat herself back down on the bench once more, and the kits gathered at her feet. Sandy sat behind them, and passed out some more of the remaining mouse "snacks."

"Now, the spell meant that every autumn, Princess Sunny would change into a raccoon, just as the color of the leaves on the trees began to turn, but she would revert back to her human self as soon as the first snowflake fell. This would continue until she had taken a mate, either from among one of the forest raccoons, or from one of her human callers, once the first snowflake fell. Sunny had no idea what was about to happen, but she was having a grand time playing with her forest friends. The kitchen maids had given her a basket of fruits and bread to feed them. Even the fish in the pond received their share, nibbling her fingers as she fed them bread from her hand. And as she distributed the food, an ominously cold wind blew through the woods, dislodging a single leaf from a nearby tree. It fluttered down to her, landing on her lap. It was still green when she picked it up, but suddenly began to turn a golden color before her eyes. Sunny looked at it amazed, before setting it on the ground. As soon as it touched the earth, she noticed the trees seemed to be growing taller. Her clothes also, began to grow larger, and the forest creatures gathered around her. They began to chatter, but somehow the princess could now understand what they were saying. _"It is a miracle! Our beautiful princess has become one of us!"_ they all cried out. She reached up to touch her face, only to find she had paws instead of hands, and fur instead of bare skin. She had shrunk out of her clothes. Frightened at first, Sunny ran to the pool in the fountain, and looked into her reflection.

"Wha-what has happened to me? I-I've become a raccoon!"

" _But such a beautiful one!"_ they chittered in unison _, "Someone has cast an enchantment on you!_ ".

As Sunny looked deeper into her reflection, the face of the old sorceress began to appear. " _The waters of the pool, have made you what you are, Princess. It has been imbued with my transformation potion. The potion only affects you, because the accompanying spell targets you alone. All you had to do was to place your hand in the water!_ "

"But-but, I don't know who you are! Why have you done such a thing to me?"

" _Eh, it's a living. I was paid for the potion, but it comes with a spell, which I have . . . 'watered down'! It will only last for five years, by which time you should have chosen your true love. Every autumn when the first colored leaf touches the ground, you will turn into a golden raccoon, as beautiful as the morning sun, and when the first snowflake of winter falls, you will return to your human self._ "

"And this spell will only last five years? That's a relief!"

" _There is a caveat. When you are in your raccoon form, you will be sought after by other raccoons because of your beauty. If you take one for a mate, you will become one of them . . . permanently!_ "

"That does pose a problem . . . wait, what did you mean by 'mate'?" said Sunny.

 _"It means if you have young ones, either due to mutual attraction, or by force!"_ The princess gulped.

"You mean, if I were to fall in love with one of them?"

" _Yes, well, you're a raccoon now, and soon you'll start to look at your fellow raccoons in a different light. If you can find yourself a human love before then, then the spell will be broken! This can still be accomplished after the first snowflake falls, when you return to being human once again!_ "

"Why are you telling me this now, and who paid you to cast the spell?"

" _Queen Belinda of Karamelo, a kingdom two weeks journey by horse from here. You rejected her son, now she means to take revenge on you! That cheapskate paid me only half my fee, so I'm giving you a warning to make up for the difference!_ "

"Her son, Prince Boggen, was one of the last suitors that came here . . . he was mean to my animal friends!"

" _Beware of him. He is a hunter with remarkable skills. When he catches wind of a golden raccoon in this forest, he will want to take your skin for his trophy room! He will stop at nothing to gain his prize!_ "

"Oh no! I'll have to stay inside the castle until winter comes!"

" _You cannot hide there for long! He is clever, and will find you wherever you go! You might be safer with your forest friends_."

"But how will I survive? What will I eat? Where will I sleep?"

" _The animals will take care of you, just as you have taken care of them! I leave you now. Do not forget what I have told you! Your life, . . . and humanity, . . . depend on it!_ " With that, the sorceress' image disappeared from the glassy surface of the pond.

The princess was stunned by the revelation, but her forest friends were still ecstatic. _"Stay and play with us, Princess! We will protect you from the mean old prince!"_ they cried out, _"Our feathered friends will watch for him from the sky, and we have many eyes and ears on the ground! You will be safe with us around!"_ Princess Sunny smiled, and bowed to them.

"We shall play for now, but I must tell my parents, lest they worry about my whereabouts."

And so she played with them until the sun began to disappear over the mountains. One by one, the animals returned to their nests and burrows. It was time for Sunny to return to the castle. She was no longer big enough to open the kitchen door by herself, so she scratched at the door, hoping that one of the servant girls would hear her. Soon enough, one of the kitchen maids came with her young daughter to check on the noise. "Oh!" she gasped, surprised, "One of the princess' furry friends! I've not seen you around before!" Sunny tried to speak, but found she no longer had the ability. "Looking for a handout, are you?" the maid asked, and offered a cookie to her. The princess sighed, taking it, and looked back with pleading eyes. "I've not seen the princess all afternoon, perhaps you know of her whereabouts?" The golden raccoon nodded excitedly, hopping around. She brought the maid and her daughter to where her clothes lay, then patted her chest as if to say she was the princess. "These are the princess' clothes, alright, but what happened to her?" The maid's young daughter rolled her eyes.

"She's trying to tell you that _she_ is Princess Sunny!" Her mother's eyes widened.

"Of course! I can see that now! I've never seen a raccoon with such blue eyes before! They are exactly like the Princess'! But I must inform the doctor before we can tell the King and Queen! You stay with the Princess, and I will fetch the royal alchemist!" She ran off, and the little girl sat on the floor next to Sunny. As with all small children, she had an affinity with animals. Staring into Sunny's blue eyes, the child could somehow communicate with her.

"Your eyes are just like Princess Sunny's, and your fur is the same color as her hair. You really are her! What happened to you?"

"A spell has been placed on me by Queen Belinda of Karamelo, for rejecting her son, Prince Boggen!" The little girl crinkled up her nose.

"Ehh, I didn't like him. He was a jerk!" Sunny laughed.

"What shall I call you, little one?"

"Una!" [Sandy: Oh, come on!] [Lily: Tut tut! Please do not interrupt the story-teller!]

"Well, Una," asked Sunny, "do you have any brothers or sisters?"

"I do have a brother, but he's a dork! He's always away on some training quest. I hardly ever see him!"

"What is he training to become?"

"He wants to become a knight errant, in the service of the royal family!"

"You're a pretty cute little girl, so he must be quite handsome!"

"Naw, he looks like someone beat him with an ugly stick! He's sooo ugly, he could give a toad warts, and you never see him with his visor up, otherwise ogres and trolls run from him on sight! And women faint dead away from seeing his ugly face! He'll never get married unless his bride is deaf, dumb and blind!"

"He . . . He sounds awful!"

"That's nothing! He also has the charm and grace of a warthog in heat! And . . . and he never bothers to write . . . or . . . or visit me and Mom!"

"Ahhhh! I see now! You're just upset because you miss him!"

"That stupid jerk!" Una wiped a tear away, "He thinks his quest is more important than being with his family!"

"Well, you shouldn't be so hard on him. I'm sure he misses you both! But I have to wonder why he couldn't stay here, and be a knight for my mother and father!"

"I don't have to remind you that we are a very small kingdom, with no army to defend us. We don't have great wealth here, just fruit orchards and vineyards. My brother wants to save all that, so he trains in some very special martial arts in order to be able to defend us."

"Seems to me that is a very noble gesture! I'd like to meet him one day! What do you call him?"

"Douche-bag, mostly!"

"I meant his _r-e-a-l_ name!"

"We call him 'Cast' . . ."

"What an unusual name! Like 'Castle'?"

". . . it's short for Overcast." [Sandra: Why couldn't you have just named him, " _Cloudy_ "?] [Lily: _Stop spoiling the story! You're worse than the kits!_ ] [Sandy: Sorry! *giggle*]

"Little did everyone know, including the forest animals, that Queen Belinda was already on her way for a 'neighborly' visit, and to see what her little 'investment,' had wrought. Still, she was about a week away. A small caravan of coaches and wagons came with her, as well as some servants. Her messengers would announce her visit at least three days before she arrived. Prince Boggen had brought a hunting party with him, but preferred to stay off the main roads as he poached some deer from the forest. If the witch's spell had worked, he would capture the princess, and put her in a cage as his prisoner. Failing that, he would take her head, and display her skin on his trophy room wall."

The kits sat glued to their spots, their eyes opened wide in shock, and their mouths hung agape.

 _"Momma, you're scaring us! He's really evil!"_ they all cried.

" _Mwa ha ha ha ha_!" Lily made her evilest laugh, baring her teeth, and they all took off, hiding behind Auntie Sandy. "Every story has to have a villain. You should know this by now! Come settle down, so I can finish the story before Sandra has to go!" Sandy laughed, passing around the last of her field mice treats, and the kits resumed their places on the floor. "Let us continue . . ." said Lily.

" Now, Princess Sunny and her animal friends were totally unaware of the approaching danger. Queen Belinda was to act only as a decoy, while Prince Boggen searched for Sunny. The problem for them was that because they left the sorceress' abode in such a hurry, they did not know what kind of animal the princess had been turned into. Their spies had poured the potion into the fountain in the dead of night, but did not linger to see any results. In her animal form, however, there would be no mistaking Sunny: fur like spun gold, with a beautiful and hefty tail! A prize for any hunter!" [Sandra: I sure hope this story has a happy ending!] [Lily: U _rrrgh!_ ]

 **Tibor's Version**

Not far away, in another part of the forest, Woo and Lily's dad, Tibor, are sitting on a log, having a conversation. Something was going on in the forest, and Tibor, the old alpha raccoon, had taken notice.

"Autumn has arrived, and most of the birds have left for warmer climates. The small creatures, field mice, ground squirrels, snakes and frogs, should be getting ready for hibernation. Instead, they are fleeing the forest, and heading towards the human settlements. I wonder why . . ." Tibor crossed his arms over his chest, and contemplated the problem.

"Sandy and I saw two raccoons today that I had chased off to Canada last year, lurking around the meadow. Could they possibly have something to do with it?" said Woo.

"Unlikely. Two raccoons are not going to start a panic among the smaller forest animals. I've been listening closely to the woodland grapevine, and there are many other raccoons arriving even now, from the hinterlands. There's not been a gathering of raccoons like this since Butterfly made her historic climb in Beech Valley! Our forest can only support a limited number of our species. When winter comes, and our food supply begins to diminish, they will invade the human communities. If that happens, then their trappers and hunters will come to reduce our numbers."

"Is there any reason for so many raccoons to be suddenly appearing in our neighborhood? What is the grapevine saying?" Tibor stuck a twig between his teeth, and twirled it around.

"Ahh, yes! There's something about an old fairytale we were told when we were kids. My mother told it to me, and I told it to Lily when she was a kit. You've probably heard it before."

"I-I'm sorry," Woo replied, "but I was orphaned when I was very young, so I'm not familiar with any of our myths and legends. What is this one about?"

"You've never heard the story of the . . . _the Autumn Queen_? Rumor has it she has been seen in the forest recently."

"No, sir. Can you tell it to me?"

"Sure! Well then, it goes something like this . . ."

 **End Chapter 4**

 **A/N: An army of raccoon groupies does not bode well for our dear Sandra! I don't think they're all hanging around for an autograph! Stay tuned. There might be a slight difference between Tibor's and Lily's versions!**


	5. Return of the Queen

**I do not own any of the characters of Sandra and Woo! They belong to Oliver Knörzer!**

 **A/N: Sandra's about to become a raccoon celebrity!**

 **Woo to You Too!**

 **Chapter 5: The Return of the Queen**

[Lily continues her story . . .]

"Now, Prince Boggen was not merely out to capture the Princess. Along with his retinue of fellow hunters, the vengeful prince brought a wagon full of traps and cages. He thought back to how he was humiliated by Sunny's animal friends, who had torn and chewed his clothes off, and he meant to capture, or kill, them all, as well. The smaller animals were not worth taking. Those would likely be killed outright, while the larger ones, like foxes and raccoons could be taken for their skins. Rabbits could easily be roasted on a spit, and eaten, although deer were preferable. Birds were of no use except for target practice. The prince had it all planned. Without the forest creatures to protect her, the Princess would be vulnerable, and as good as his. His men were to set traps as they got closer to the castle, and rid themselves of the pesky trouble makers.

In the meantime, the royal physician was examining the raccoon princess. Back in those days, being a physician meant you had to be versed in many disciplines: astrology, alchemy, and arcane languages. The doctor's name was Melodia! [Sandra: _"Again?!"_ ]

With just a single look, Dr. Melodia came up with an immediate diagnosis. _"Hmm,"_ said the physician, _". . . obviously a human/animal transformation enchantment. Fortunately, there aren't that many possible formulas and spells capable of doing this. I'll need some time to decipher this water-based spell. It looks like some older, arcane form of . . . Voynich . . . if that's even possible!"_ [Sandy: "B-uh!"]

"What's Voynich?" little Una asked.

"It comes from a book of magical plants and potions, and written in a language few can understand. I [*ahem*] just so happen to be one of them!" said the physician, "Many of the plants have become extremely rare due to over-harvesting, so much of the writing is about where to find them. I've managed to propagate a number of them in the royal hot-house, for our personal use so they will come in handy should we need fresh ingredients. Some of the other drawings depict fairies crushing the plants between their toes to make the potions! It's useless without the abridged second volume, 'Magical Potions for Dum-dums'! Fortunately, I have one of few remaining copies!" Una rolled her eyes back.

"When I get older, I'll invent a machine that will convert energy into matter, and bypass all this magic bullshit! Then we can _really_ do something about conserving these rare and endangered plants . . ." Dr. Melodia gave a chuckle, and patted her head.

". . . Well that's nice, dear! You have fun with that!" Una and Sunny watched as Melodia left to give her report to the King and Queen. Una thumbed her nose at the physician behind her back.

"Hmph! _Magic snob_! Science is much better! I'll prove it one day!" Sunny giggled.

 **An Evil Plan**

Prince Boggen had not only intended to get revenge on Princess Sunny, but also on the animals that had literally stripped him of his clothes and dignity. He had instructed a few of his men to go ahead, and scatter poisoned corn to rid the skies of any spying birds that might still be around. Whatever furry animals who might come across the bait, would be killed off as well: field mice, squirrels, and even deer, were not immune to the powerful poisons. [All: *Gasp!*] Some of the men laid out snares for the bigger animals: Raccoons, foxes, rabbits, and possums. A few others even dug a pit trap for the occasional rogue elephant!" [Sandy: _"Really now?!"_ ]

The effect was almost immediate: the Ravens, crows, and even owls, began to disappear. The small creatures, mice and the like, took the corn to fill their winter stores, eating some to fatten up for what would be their never-ending sleep. The raptors picked off the dying animals, not realizing they had been poisoned, and were thus poisoned themselves. Prince Boggen smiled wickedly to himself, thinking of the chaos he would create, killing off all the animals that Sunny considered her friends, but most of all, he wanted to capture the princess, and keep her locked in a cage. [Vega: "Grrr! I wanna bite him, and eat his liver!"] [Lily: "You've been listening to your Auntie Ruth too much, now settle down so I can get back to my story!"]

Sandra giggled. Lily was a good story teller, and having been turned into a raccoon, North could now listen in on the conversations between the mother and her kits that was not possible without Seeohatlahmakaskay's magic. It was not much different from a typical human mother dealing with her children.

"Now then, shall we continue?" Everyone nodded quietly. "Now Sunny's father and mother, the king and queen, having been apprised of the situation, came to the kitchen to see their transformed daughter. Queen Zoey picked Sunny up, smothering her in kisses. [Sandra: _"Zoey?! Ewww!"_ ] [Lily: "Is there a problem?"] [Sandra: "The king wouldn't happen to be named Michelle, would he?"] [Lily: "Michel. How'd you know?"] [Sandy: "Somehow it figures!"] [Lily: "Yes, now will you kindly hold your comments till the end of the story?! . . . _Please?!_ "] Lily started once more.

"*Ahem!* Where was I? Okay. Now the King and Queen were deeply concerned over the safety of Princess Sunny. Una mentioned nothing about Prince Boggen at Sunny's request, lest they start a war with the neighbors, one they could not possibly win. Until Dr. Melodia figured out how to undo the spell, their main concern was to keep Sunny safe and comfortable. The king had his craftsmen build a special little bed for her, and the queen mapped plans for an escape route in case the worst should happen. A messenger had just arrived to inform them of Queen Belinda's forthcoming visit, one they could not afford to refuse. They would need to make preparations for that, and come up with a reasonable excuse for the absence of the princess, also.

Meanwhile, Boggen and his men had set up a camp on a rocky hill out of sight from the castle. There they would wait until the queen completed her espionage to find the whereabouts of the transformed Princess Sunny. Until then, they hunted to their hearts content. The prince was an avid hunter, but he was wasteful, often killing for sport, and leaving the carcasses where they fell. He had depleted their own lands of game, and it was not unusual for him and the others to venture into the territories of neighboring kingdoms to indulge this hunting addiction. He was never caught, and needless to say, the other kingdoms were none too happy. To the prince, it was a game to be played. They would never catch him because he was far too clever.

His men came back from their scouting with some pheasants and a wild boar, to which Prince Boggen gave close scrutiny.

"These haven't been poisoned, have they?" he asked, for the poisoned bait was quick acting, coursing through the animals' bodies, rendering them useless for consumption.

"No, your highness," the men replied, "the poison was scattered only around the castle within a half mile radius. We caught these miles away."

"And you weren't followed back here?"

"Ha ha ha!" they all laughed, "We are the best hunters in the four kingdoms! Only the devil would be able to find us!" Little did they know how prophetic their words would turn out to be.

"My father, the late king, was also an excellent hunter," Boggen related, "but even he ended up on the wrong end of an arrow. By all accounts, I have surpassed him as a hunter, so beware of who you are boasting to! There are far more cunning creatures living in these trees that are watching our every move. If you are not careful, they will hunt you also!"

"You're just trying to scare us," one of them laughed, "but it won't work because we've seen everything that this forest has to offer!"

"Well, _something_ in these lands killed my father with an arrow unlike any of those made by man. Have you noticed this kingdom has very little soldiers to guard their territories? What need is an army when the forest itself is a weapon!" His men scoffed.

"You would have married this princess had she said 'yes', and taken over her kingdom! Why would you want to become heir to this land if you think it is cursed?!" said one man.

" _Cursed?_ I never said it was cursed! Only that there are creatures here that hunt men! They come out when the moon is full, and I intend to take one of them as an addition to my trophy room!"

"Like a _'Hide-Behind'_?" they all laughed.

"Phah! That's just an old woodsman's tale!" said Boggen, "What _I'm_ looking for is more like a harpy, with claws like daggers, moving from tree to tree, and armed with a bow. I've yet to see one, but many are the stories from hunters frightened out of their wits by close encounters with the creatures. My father must have cornered one of them, and met his end with one of their arrows stuck in his back." The men stared at the prince, lips curled in disbelieving smirks, while at the same time casting their eyes up to the surrounding treetops.

"The next thing you'll be telling us is that there are unicorns here!" The prince just chuckled.

"Those are in the next kingdom over!" he said, "We can go there after this 'princess' problem is taken care of!" [Sandra: "I know what a 'hide-behind' is! I saw the one on Gravity Fa . . . !] [Lily: "Shut up, you!"]

"Uh, Mom?" Arcturus interrupted, "I think I hear someone coming!" The others planted their ears to the ground to listen for themselves.

"What now!" Lily sighed.

 **Story Interruptus**

Woo came crashing through the brush, ignoring thorns and stickers to get to Lily's hollow tree, and grab Sandra. If he understood the story Tibor had just told him, Sandy was in a predicament. The gathering of raccoons was growing rapidly in the meadow, waiting for their "queen" to appear. Although Woo understood it to be just a fanciful tale, he had to be sure Sandy would be safe. That meant getting her back to the house as soon as possible, because they had to pass through the same grassy meadow to get there. Lily's hollow was close-by, but he had to keep his distance or risk the ire of his mate.

"Sandra!" he called out, and Lily rolled her eyes upon hearing his voice.

"Hey! Didn't I banish you for a week?!" Woo bent over puffing and panting from his sprint through the woods.

"Yes yes, and I'm sorry, dear," he gasped, "but Sandra's in great danger! I've got to get her back home as quickly as possible!"

"I'm in the middle of telling a story, and you are interrupting! Can't it wait?"

"Not if what your father told me is true!" Sandy poked her head from out of the den.

"What's going on, Woo?" she asked.

"Sandy! You remember those two big raccoons we spotted at the edge of the meadow earlier? Well, they saw you, and have been spreading the rumor that the 'Queen' has finally returned!"

" _'Queen'_?! What Queen are you talking about?"

"The Autumn Queen! They all think _you_ are the Autumn Queen!"

"Like in the raccoon fairytale? Lily's been telling me the story!"

" _No!_ You don't understand! There are five thousand other raccoons hanging around the meadow, wanting to mate with you, each one wants to become the _Raccoon King_!"

Sandy raised an eyebrow at first, then a worried look spread across her face. _"M-m-mate w-with me?! Five thousand?!"_

"It'll be _ten_ thousand if we wait too much longer!" The look of alarm on her face grew ten-fold instantly.

"I-I couldn't possibly . . .! I-I would explode!"

"The thing is, if any of them succeed, you'll remain a raccoon for the rest of your life!"

"B-but I don't want to remain a raccoon forever! I mean, no offense, but under all this fur, I'm a human, and Cloud is my boyfriend! How can I possibly explain all this to him, my friends, and my father?!" Lily stepped between them, getting in Woo's face, and poked him in his chest several times with some force.

"Pfft! You're jumping to conclusions, Woo!" she snarked, "You've been told the _male's_ version by my dad! His story is all about sex and making babies! Mine is much better! It's about happy endings and justice served! Anyway, it's just a story!" Woo pleaded with her once more.

"Please Lily! We can't take that chance! Sandra's future is at stake here!" Lily looked at Sandra's worried face, and her initial irritation gave way to acquiescence.

"I suppose you have a point, but if she turns back into a human again, she may never hear the end of my story!"

"I'll translate it for her, okay? It can't be that much different from your Dad's!"

"Oh believe me, it's plenty different!" Lily scooted them out of the hollow, with some misgivings, and sighed. "Maybe we should follow them, and make sure everything turns out all right. What do you say, kids?" [All the kits: _"Yay! An excursion!"_ ]

"But are you going to finish your story, Momma?" asked the precocious Vega.

"Yes, but it would have been so much easier if Sandra was already here!"

 **End Chapter Five**

 **A/N: Lily's name choices are strictly coincidental, I assure you [Not!]. Don't worry, Lily will get to finish her story!**


End file.
